<3 fine art and thrift stores

My scalp is so itchy and it’s making me miserable. While I’m still not thrilled about self injecting, I seriously need to start my meds again. I forgot how uncomfortable this whole thing is. It’s making me so unhappy.

I need a break. Just like 3 days off where I don’t have to do things and I don’t feel like crap. I haven’t made any art in weeks and with having the one day off I haven’t been able to get out to Bucks to work on my pewter casts. Its making me feel so shitty, but I also am just so tired. Even today where I didn’t work that many hours I still am so beat.

I woke up before 8 but I was good. The weather is confusing me and my outfit wasn’t the best, but things were okay. My train had a lot of people going to the baseball game and were all to loud. I got downtown around 1115 and Mickey had left me a list of things to do. I wrote a little paper on how rivers change landscapes (flooding and erosion!) and did some little tasks. Honestly making copies and cutting paper was just really soothing, mindless work and I had a good time doing it.

In the early afternoon Shanna sent me out into the world to find 80 peeps, 6 bags of marshmallows, 2 bags of kosher marshmallows, and a pound of grapes. And while I had a nice walk and it was beautiful out, I was a complete failure at my given task. I went to CVS first and they didn’t have any peeps and the store was very crowded and made me anxious, so I left even though they had marshmallows. I stopped at rite aid next with no luck there either. Then Walgreens where they had 4 bags of regular marshmallows, but only 2 boxes of peeps. Those were $5 each because they had a stuffed animal on top so I didn’t get them but did get the marshmallows. I called Shanna at this point because I had been gone a while. I let her know I wasn’t having any luck and was going to try trader joes before heading back. They had the grapes but not anything else and the line was wrapped around the store so I just left. I hate failing at tasks. But Shanna said it was okay and just bought them online and got next day shipping. We ate some of the marshmallows I had bought and things were okay.

The rest of my day was just little tasks like cutting out paper fish for the prek camp. It was nice. And I caught the early express train home. I went to lowes to get wire and spray paint but they didn’t have wire? Somehow. I will go to homedepot tomorrow I guess. I am also going to repaint my bike this weekend. I am very excited about that.

Basically I have been in bed all afternoon/night though. I wanted to work on stuff but I had dinner and sort of just crashed. I will get things done this weekend. I cant wait for this week to be over though. I’m excited for the start of the science festival, but spring break is killing me.

Work all day tomorrow and then hopefully projects. I have a list of things I want to do and hopefully I can get some packing for the move done. Wish me luck. Goodnight.   


That was so beautiful


That was so beautiful

(Source: johto-jordan)

I very much do not feel like writing this right now. I am feeling very lazy. But its alright. Today was a good day.

I got to sleep in a little bit but still woke up before 9.  I felt pretty good though and I had given myself 2 hours to get ready and do stuff. I did some yoga and showered and got dressed. It was pretty chilly out today so I wore some warmer things, softer things. I made a really good omelet with spinach and cheddar cheese and chives. It was so good. Also I love chives, they are the best.

I left around 1030 and stopped at rite aid for another new eye liner. I like the one I got but its not water proof and isn’t lasting the whole day. Rite Aid carries the one I used to use unlike CVS. So now I have two and will keep the not waterproof one in my purse for touch ups or whatever.

I got down town and after a brief stopover in guest services to pick up the smoothie I had forgotten I went up to work. Really I didn’t do much in the offices today. They actually had me on the floor. I was nervous but I had read the training packets on the train so I felt at least a little prepared. I was down at the Van de Graff generator with Reggy for 45 minutes and then Ken for only a bit. They are both very nice but it was clear that Reggy liked things in a very particular so I tried to stick to what he wanted done. Basically we were making things float and show how static works. But the generator was being crazy powerful today and I’m already pretty afraid to touch it and I didn’t even touch it and got shocked a few times. So when Ken came down he made the decision to take it off the floor so no one would get hurt. It was really going wild. Me and Ken walked around and watched some other live science shows before we went back upstairs.

I had my lunch and read and it was nice. I don’t feel 100 percent comfortable on the floor explaining science but I’m sure with practice I could be good. Things went much better when I was up at the observatory. I had found that packet much more interesting so I retained it better. I was there with Ashely and she manned the big telescope (doing a mighty fine job btw) and I did the little sun spotter and viewing disk (that’s name I forget). I sat with all the little kids who came up and I joked with them about not staring at the sun and explained sun spots. It felt really good and they called me Miss Jessica which was precious. They were all very excited about things and were super pumped to be able to see the sun.

After a few more tasks and setting up my interview with Jessica for the discovery camp (next Wensday!!!) I went home. After a brief detour to get milk (and Barbie pink nail polish, and viatimins) I got to the house and mom made pizza and I’ve basically been in bed since then. I haven’t done my exercise bike at all this week and I don’t see next week happening either. These long shifts just aren’t going to let me and I’m to beat up for it. I’ll get back into it when things calm down after spring break season.

Interning again tomorrow. I am looking forward to it actually. Just like I’m looking forward to a good nights rest.  


James Sant, Courage, Anxiety, and Despair Watching the Battle


James Sant, Courage, Anxiety, and Despair Watching the Battle

(Source: uromancy)

I made a smoothie yesterday and brought it to work and forgot about it? I hope it is still in the fridge when I go in to intern. 



the goal is to love myself so much it offends other people


Today was a pretty good day but I’m almost positive my feet are bruised.

I, unsurprisingly, did not sleep well. But thankfully I get to sleep in a few extra hours tomorrow at least. I packed up my lunch and made breakfast and even had time to feed the outside cats. I got the 745 train with no issues and the soft faced conductor was there again.

When I was at the train station though I was sitting in the little train house thing reading and stood up to go outside and the cleaning man that was there says “DAMN!” out loud and I go “what?” and he said he thought I was tall when I was sitting down and had surprised him being so short. We all got a good laugh over that.

Work itself was long. And my feet hurt all day.  But it wasn’t a bad day. I most mostly in Pompeii and it was a bit boring at times but nothing majorly bad happened. I met a lot of nice people and a few people told me I was beautiful. I wasn’t feeling so hot, my hair was frizzy and I feel smelly, so it was nice to hear.

I had an hour lunch which I have to say is really awesome. I made a baked potato in the microwave (stab potato, wrap in a wet papertowel, nuke 5 minutes, cut open, rewet papertowel, nuke another 5), and it was so good! I probably wouldn’t make it if I was in a rush but it really made me feel good for the rest of the day. I also brought a lot of snacks with me so I was golden.

Mickey found me and asked me if I would do carts on the floor tomorrow and I’ve never done that before so I am nervous but I have the training packets to read and its always fun to learn something new.

Towards the end of the day I was up in Pompeii and Gerhert, a nice german man who is an artist, came up with us and we taught him how to use the theater and what to do. He misplaced his wedding ring and we searched for it but didn’t find it. He didn’t seem to bothered by it. I still hope it turns up.

We ended up talking, me, Gerhert, and Joe, for an hour and it was nice. I showed them my art and we talked about parents and painting and the decline of civilization. Joe is the grumpiest person every but he’s a realist at heart and a good person. Gerhert told me his name’s prefix means “spear” so his name is “Spear Heart”. Literally the best medieval name.

Emily was sweet enough to switch with me so I didn’t miss my train. Actually when I got to the station the 628 was 52 minutes late so they ended up making it the 717 and it was right on time. My conductor was on again and we talked a little about dumb stuff. I am a big creep so I snapped a picture of him to show you. Still unsure of his name, him name tag just says “G.” maybe I will tell him my name next time I see him.

I got home not to long ago and mom saved me some pasta and I made a little pizza and I think now I am going to take a hot bath and listen to the new Welcome to Nightvale.

Intern tomorrow but not until noon. Sleep well.  

good morning

good morning


PABLO PICASSO, Head, 1948. Ink on paper.


PABLO PICASSO, Head, 1948. Ink on paper.

Wow today was a long day. But we struggled through and now I’m home and sore but good.

I woke up a little after 6, after a night spent mostly tossing and turning. But I didn’t feel so bad. I was mostly just thinking about naps. I have a feeling tonight and tomorrow morning will be the same especially since I got home so late. It was so beautiful today and I wore the shortest dress but I felt really good about myself so it was alright. And the cute, soft faced conductor was on both my trains today and we talked for a bit so it was alright too.

Work was long. 10 hours. I did get an hour lunch but that went by to quick. I was in Pompeii by myself most of today but honestly it could have been worse. I found small moments to sit down and while it was busy it was just nice people. I felt a little snippy with a few people because it was so muggy and humid but honestly today was just good. I complained a lot, sure, but at the end of the day things were good.

I talked to Cliff for a little today and he brought me water ice. Cherry. He was actually up in Pompeii with me a lot because the lights kept flickering and then some of them just went out completely. Thankfully the fog machine and the videos were all working well, regardless of weird light problems.

I have to say though the water ice was probably my favorite part of today, getting a call from HR asking me to interview for the discovery camp position was a highlight. I’m not sure when in the next week or so it will happen because its spring break and it can be hectic. But they want to meet with me. I interview well so hopefully this one goes well too.

Pete made sure I didn’t have to close anything and was able to make my train. With a minute or 2 to spare even. And I got to chat with the soft faced conductor. And it was nice. He asked me where I worked and we chatted about nothing in particular. My ride home was nice but I was hungry and wanted good foods for lunches and I’m sick of eating out. So when I got back to my car I went to the grocery store and bought so much things. There are pros and cons to shopping when hungry. Pros I got many tasty things for different dishes. Con I bought 2 bags of cookies, 2 bags of chips, donuts, and a small cake.

I’m home now. I had dinner and made lunch. And a smoothie. And I’m going to start winding down. I am sore and my feet feel bruised, but I’m happy. sleep well. 

I got myself all worked up and scared and now I cant turn the lights off.i have to work for 12 hours tomorrow this is not okay. 

I’m not feeling so hot. I have had a wicked head ache all afternoon and I’m so tired. I am once again skipping exercising. I just cant do it. I am so nauseous and dizzy I don’t even want to think about working out.

I was up every hour last night but I didn’t feel so bad when I did get up.  I didn’t have much time to make food so I just had some waffles for breakfast. But that left me very tired because no protein. But I struggled through. My day was pretty good, but long. I was at the Pompeii ticket line all morning and it was nice. The poor cashier got sick though and had to go home half way through the morning. I hope she feels better. It was wicked busy today though. The line for Pompeii was down the ramp all day pretty much and it was exhausting.

When I had lunch I tried my best to relax but I ended up more tired with a head ache in my eyes. It made the last 4 hours of my day very much not fun. I tried my best to not be miserable but I was just so tired. And I knew it was beautiful outside but I couldn’t enjoy that. I mostly just read a lot and tried not to throw up. Honestly not a lot of interesting things happened today, it was just busy and repetitive. My friend Cliff did show me a ballet he worked on and told me about a $20,000 commission him and the people he writes the ballets with just got. He also encouraged me to keep working on my art. I wish I had the time and motivation right now. I just feel so beat. I hope things even out for me soon because I feel like I’m dying all the time.

I took the train home and the cute conductor was on, I haven’t seen him in a while so it was nice. He always smiles at me and he has a sweet soft face.

I picked up dinner for my parents and me and did not come home to something good. I walked up stairs and see the new lamp I got has fallen into the fish tank. Probably was in there all day. Thankfully it didn’t electrocute my fish but it did cause crazy green algae and I think it scolded the plants.  The water was super warm. So I dumped what I could and tried to salvage the tank. Thankfully the plastic didn’t melt through but it has some warping. I am pretty upset about it.

But I think he will be okay. I’m just so tired. I’m in bed now and I just want to go to sleep. I work from 9 until 7 tomorrow. I am going to ask to not have to close anything so I don’t miss my train. I want to be home by 8. I am very much not looking forward to the next few days. And I forgot to stop for coconut milk like I wanted. Hopefully I am not to exhausted tomorrow. Sleep well my friends. 

My friend wrote this ballet and is very talented and you should check it out.